Why would you say that I’m not capable of reading an actual book? The fuck did I do?

“Why am I in trouble for this? We at Audi have a proud history of supporting the Nazi efforts.”

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Twice. He achieved that twice. He did it in the first term when he failed to address COVID properly, and then people put him back in office where he’s already done more damage in half the time. I’m almost certain that our place on the world stage is irreversibly gone. And people continue to cheer as he yanks more and more jenga blocks without even the courtesy of a test poke. They’ll continue cheering when the tower comes crashing down. They are too dumb to recognize how fucked they are.

Idk, I briefly considered trying to sell overpriced trump merch. Maybe make everything say “TRUNP” or “TURMP” to avoid lawsuits. There’s nothing wrong with siphoning money away from dipshit assholes.

Fr, Alaska is just a territory that America bought and granted statehood to, and then was quickly transitioned into petrostate status once we learned what it had underground. All they have is big oil and some fishing to prop up its economy. Yes, we should be weaning off of gas and oil, but you don’t get elected by telling people that you’re gonna make sure they get laid off.

investigations are the first part of due process.

That is also the only part that the legislative branch can really do. Based on what is found during investigations, they can recommend charges, but that’s about it. Arrests and charges come from the executive branch. Trial and sentencing come from the judicial branch. This separation of power is a safeguard against king shit, and believe it or not, the king shit we’re seeing in action is still less absolute than it could be if not for some power not yet ceded to the executive.

People just didn’t understand the joke. He was put in charge of that show as a mascot. NBC thought that it was understood that trump is a terrible businessman who doesn’t know shit about fuck and just postures as he barely does better than breaking even on his inheritance from his daddy. Until ten years ago, he was doing worse financially than if he’d just put it in an index fund and ignored it, but he insisted on playing pretend business instead of doing literally anything else. At worst he’s dogshit at this, at best he’s just pretending to be dogshit as he launders money and grifts.

“I don’t want Muslims in office because then we’ll have sharia law” and also “I want to criminalize abortion and gay and science because of muh Bible” without even a hint of hesitation or reflection.

And that’s exactly what that interaction spelled out for anybody who had the attention span to watch all 3 minutes or whatever it was.

That’s because the Epstein class has defunded education.

There are good sparkling NA options so you can have a special, celebratory drink without breaking the streak. Also, congrats on 8 years!

If dems have anything that resembles a spine, they will immediately terminate funds for the war, sue the administration for the illegal war, and impeach this meddlesome rapist the day their majority is sworn in. I fucking hate this worthless asshole, and I’m really worried that even with a blue wave the establishment cucks will run cover our oppressor yet again instead of fucking him to death in the middle of the National Mall for everybody to watch like he deserves. And each of his lieutenants should be put on notice for that to be their fate if they don’t get their shit together.

I’d watch. Hell, I’d pay. Is PPV still a thing?

Because the only three named guy who’s tried to rectify that had shitty fucking aim, and I assume security has ramped up since.

I’ve never not done that. I was under the impression that he’s the dumbest motherfucker alive, but tens of millions of dumbass motherfuckers still are falling for his stupid bullshit after ten years of widespread exposure of what a dumb motherfucker he is, so I guess those dumb motherfuckers must be dumber than this dumb motherfucker.

Idk, with nothing to lose and a deranged obsession with getting as much attention as possible, there’s a lot more damage that he can do.

I excitedly launch my news app every time I hear anything that might be gunshots or fireworks. I have an $80 bottle of bourbon on deck.

Link for those who have forgotten that this was a literal quote. Was it just a joke? No. It’s a joke, AND ALSO it’s how he actually feels.

By crowds of people pointing and laughing in public. These stupid fucks have been given more than enough time and grace to be welcomed back on their own.

I’m glad to see Josh Johnson in the hosting rotation lately. For those who don’t know, he also releases a live, fresh, topical stand-up routine every Tuesday night on his YouTube channel. Idk how he can churn that out while traveling in between appearances on TDS. He must just love doing it.